The Secretary

As you may or may not be aware, getting the chance to write my own blog also afforded me the opportunity to hire an employee to help with any questions I may have whilst writing said blog.  Now, this is not just any employee but essentially my very own secretary.

To keep the privacy of my lackey secretary I will not reveal his name, but you certainly can see a picture of him here.
Today I headed into the Metrodome to pay him one last visit before I head off to Spring Training.  When I arrived at his career station something seemed just a tad off.  Unable to initially draw my own conclusion, I moved in for a closer look.  Take a gander for yourself:
My first thought upon closer inspection was that he may have gotten a haircut.  Then it hit me.  This was not my assistant/secretary/lapdog at all!!! It was an impostor!!!  Who is this man do you ask?  How could I tell?  One thing gave it away- the Full Windsor knot on his tie.  My secretary would never be caught with no-less than the always impressive Shelby Knot.
The next question I would ask myself is why on earth someone would attempt to impersonate my secretary?  Let’s be honest, being a secretary to a fledgling bloggist is not the most glamorous job.  I had to get to the bottom of this mystery and go in for an even closer look.  At this point I am practically on top of his desk peering into his eyes.  Here is what I saw:
It turns out my secretary was out for the day with a “sore back” so he thought he could trick me with a mannequin.  He should have told his accomplice his tie-knot preference and he would have snuck it right by me!!  Pity the fool who thinks he can fool me!!


  1. twinsnut

    It is fun reading your blog. It must be nice to be famous enough to have your own secretary (or secremaniquin). I am looking forward to reading some of your comments from Spring Training if they let you poor pitchers have any time to get to your computer.
    Good luck!

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